Hey there ladies,
Today I wanted to chat about something that is such a common struggle for people, but especially women, negative self-talk. These negative thoughts that seem to continuously pop up into our head become such a normal occurrence that most of the time we don’t realize its happening. Whether it’s thoughts like I’m not good enough, I don’t deserve that or anything else along those lines, hang tight, I’m going to give you some pointers to overcome them.
1.Check your facts.
Most of the time these crummy thoughts that happen between our ears have been developed over the course of our life. Maybe you slipped up during a speech at school and now you label yourself as a terrible public speaker. Maybe you were always told you were shy and now you tell yourself you stink in social situations. Whatever the ‘talk’ is let’s check the facts.
First you want to check for evidence. Are these thoughts I’m telling myself really true. What backs it up? Is there actual facts or is it just how I perceive the situation?
2.Put yourself in new shoes
If this were a friend you were talking to would these same thoughts still be coming up or would you have some more grace with them? An important question to explore if this is the case is why don’t you deserve the same grace you give to others?
3. Notice your thoughts
These thoughts have become so normal for us, most of the time we simply don't even realize we are thinking them. Take some time to pay attention to these thoughts. When do they come up? What are they typically about?
4. Change them up
This is when we really focus on changing what we are saying. It can be SUCH a challenge at first but so important. It might be one of those times we just need to fake it until we make it, or in this case fake it until we rewire our brain!
An example of this could be "you've tried this a million times, it wont ever work!"
My goal would be to change that with "I am SO proud of myself for making ME a priority. I may not be perfect but I never give up!"
Give yourself some grace and all the love you can.
Hanna Kuyper is a wife, a mom and a lover of all things outdoors. She has owned a women only wellness studio, sat on the board of a non profit dedicated to eating disorder and body image awareness and has volunteered as a mentor for girls in school. She is a current Marriage and Family Therapy Masters student and will graduate in April 2018.