Hey sweet friends,
I remember when I first began my journey towards health. It was confusing. It was difficult. It was extreme. It wasn't very.....healthy. I was lost and there was a whole lot of conflicting information out there. Over the years I've been able to learn through trial and error and I would love to share some of my thoughts.
1. Remember you are a unique person.
We all have different needs. With that in mind, make changes that work for you, not for the stranger you see on Instagram or your best friend who tried a diet and lost 30 pounds. It's so easy to see all this conflicting information and get so confused. What it comes down to is different things work for different people. Don't think it's a black and white picture.
2. Start so small it seem silly.
When we want to change our health it can get overwhelming when we start adding up allll the new habits we want to acquire. Start so small that it seems silly. I bet 90% of people won't do this because it seems SO simple but I challenge you to try. If you want to change anything start here. About four years ago I was a stress case. I was going to start meditating in the morning, so me being me, I wanted to set the goal of meditating 20 minutes every morning. Sounds great right? The issue is there is no way I would have stuck with that in the long run. At the time I was working on this with a therapist and she suggested I start smaller. What did we come up with? Something I could not fail at. 30 seconds was all I had to do. It seems so small it was pointless. WRONG. I stuck with that until it became a habit because it was so simple and so easy. Now I use the Calm app to help me.
3. Focus on how you actually want to feel.
When it comes to our health, It's so typical to get this number in our head and think when we get there life is going to be rainbows and butterfly's. We can reach any number on the scale but if we're not feeling the way we want to feel it's not going to do anything for us. Instead of thinking about a number...think about what you're hoping to feel like. Calm? Refreshed? Happy? Now ask yourself what things make you feel that way. You can read more about that here.
4. If you can't do it forever, do you need to be doing it?
Ask yourself this question. For me, if i'm tempted to try something new I ask myself "Could I keep this up forever?" What I've come to learn is what I can do forever is balance. Nourishing and honoring my body but still enjoying a sweet treat when I want it. Some days I rest, most days I move. I listen to my body and trust that it knows what it wants. This takes time to do but it is such a cool thing when you get the hang of it.
5. Be gentle with yourself and no it's okay that you're not perfect.
Allow the ups and downs. Allow life to happen. Some days you'll get to yoga and some days you'll be busy and forget. Both are okay. Be kind to yourself. Allow yourself to be human.
Get cozy and take some time for yourself. Pull out pen and paper and make a list of what you want your life to feel like. Next, jot down what things make you feel that way.
I hope some of these tips help you. They're all things I've had the honor of learning in a messy way over the years.
Today I want to chat self care. We KNOW how it important it is, we are constantly told we should be doing it but let's be real, sometimes it's tough to make happen. Days don't go as planned, we have a family to take care of, we are exhausted... It's easy to let our own well-being fall to the end of the list. But here's the thing, when we make our self care a priority, it allows us to be a better wife, mom and friend. It makes our patience a last a little bit longer. It makes us kinder to ourselves. It allows us to feel better. It's time we say enough is enough and make self care a regular part of our schedules. It's time we stop making "busy" sound so glamorous.
So what usually goes wrong?
If you've been trying to add in self care but it just isn't working check in with these things.
I hope some of these tips help!
Hanna Kuyper is a wife, a mom and a lover of all things outdoors. She has owned a women only wellness studio, sat on the board of a non profit dedicated to eating disorder and body image awareness and has volunteered as a mentor for girls in school. She is a current Marriage and Family Therapy Masters student and will graduate in April 2018.